In the middle

I feel like I've somehow gotten a lot older in the past three weeks. I've lived by myself for the first time--no dorms, no roommates. I've become a teacher with real, live students. I've been spending my free time with people who are over the age of 25, are married, who own the property where they live, who have masters degrees and careers, whose next "step" in life is deciding when to have kids. In some ways it's good; I'm kind of tired of being a teenager. Other times, though, I think I'm a lot older, but then I remember that I'm 19, and it results in an open-mouthed, wrinkled-forehead, quizzical look as I contemplate the paradox of feeling old while being young and only half way through college. I think I need to start spending more time with people my own age.